Eulogy Writing

Eulogy Writing – How a Daunting Task Can Become One of the Most Rewarding Things You’ve Ever Done

Eulogy writing can seem scary at first, but here is a simple 6-step process you can follow to make it easy. I’ve identified this process from having written, advised on and delivered over 100 eulogies in my time as a professional Funeral Presider (taking the role traditionally filled by the priest). So you know this works!

This isn’t just about the actual writing of the eulogy on a piece of paper – it’s also about ensuring you deliver it well on the day.

Take a moment for yourself, away from distractions, to centre yourself and connect with the person who has gone.
Decide whether you are giving a potted “life story” type eulogy, or whether yours will be purely about your own personal experiences of the person who has died. Either can be very personal and meaningful, and you can even blend the two (see more below).
Gather together the information you need – this may involve speaking to other people, or simply brainstorming your thoughts onto paper.
Put it all in sequence, and add a beginning and an end.
Practice giving the eulogy at home, or mentally rehearse doing it really well in your mind’s eye. Time yourself, and if it needs to be shorter, take some parts out – you naturally cannot cover everything about someone’s life, it’s simply a question of giving a flavour.
Deliver the eulogy on the day. Have a little bottle of water and some tissues with you, and speak to people from your heart. If you cry or have to pause at times, that’s fine. Remember you have an extremely sympathetic audience who all want you to do well and are keen to hear what you have to say.

A bit more about Step 2. This table compares the two kinds of eulogies, and helps you decide which kind of eulogy you will write and deliver…

Potted “Life Story”	Personal View
Can be highly personal and moving and succeed in reminding everyone of the person they have come to honour and remember.
Can include stories – funny or otherwise.
Includes the basic facts of someone’s life, e.g. their date of birth, names of parents, their first job. This can lend a fitting dignity to the eulogy.	Paints a picture of the person through personal memories and experiences, perhaps of yours and of other people.
Gives you a framework to fit everything into, which helps the writing process.	Is less structured, though you may still tend to start at the beginning and end at the end.
There can only be one short biography at a funeral, perhaps on its own, or perhaps complemented by some personal views.	There may be one or more personal views at a funeral, perhaps in addition to a short biography.
Is probably fairly comprehensive.	Can be very short, just a slice of how you feel, especially if a couple of other people are also speaking.

Follow the above steps and you will give a great eulogy. You will help the grieving process of everyone who hears you speak, as well of course as helping your own.

Step-by-step guidance on all of these steps, plus example eulogies, wonderful funeral poems, quotations and public speaking tips, is available in my downloadable guide How to Write and Deliver a Great Eulogy in 6 Simple Steps. This comes with a 100% money-back satisfaction guarantee. You can see more here.

To buy the guide straight away, click here.